Green Glade Hackers 2 - 1 Frati de Sange

‘They’re all a bit pale...’ whispered Twister Pine-Cone, nervously watching their opponents from across the half-way line.


‘Hark at her!’ crowed “Thoroughly Dubious” Duran from the sideline. ‘You need a bit of sun yourself, love!’ he sneered , still gripping his pom-poms in his broken fingers. He cast a withering glance at Wynona as she cartwheeled her way down the edge of the pitch. The cheerleader had the crowd on their feet, jeering and slavering in equal measure. Duran shook his head, ‘And you can watch your step an’all, yer dozy tart.’

‘GROUGH-RAAAAAR-GRRRRRRR!’ agreed Girth. But Girth was a tree and didn’t really understand what was going on.

Maybe it was the blizzard which swirled around in the roaring gale, but their opponents did look a bit pale, and Twister couldn’t help but find it a little unsettling, the funny spots which were dotted around the white pitch, deep red, turning pink as they spread...

‘I think they may be vampires,’ he continued, but Glorfindel was only half-listening, concentrating more on when to plant the ball.

‘Of course they’re bloody vampires! Now watch this!’

“Go Long” Glorfindel fired the ball down the pitch and it was lost in a curtain of snow before it even touched down.

The referee’s whistle blew the start of the match and, without him being aware of it, Twister Pine-Cone’s hand was nervously rubbing his neck...

By the end, the Hackers had to agree that it was a good game – a much-needed good game – after a rather uninspired start to the season. It was close, sometimes too close, but victory came finally without anybody getting killed, or worse, resurrected.

The Hackers would like to thank the Frati de Sange team for a great game and complement them on the spirit they showed throughout the match. (And if they could please return our cheerleader to us when they’ve finished with her, it would be much appreciated...)

Green Glade Hackers 2 - 2 Ashen Villains

The winds scoured the cursed grass, half-dead, of the Ashen Villains’ stadium. Heads bowed mournfully, the Green Glade Hackers didn’t notice its bitter teeth. Today had been Clooney’s funeral, and even the threat of their Dark kin could not wake them from their woeful gloom. The Villains revelled in their misery, pressing their advantage. Before the first ball had even touched the foul earth, they were upon their foes, hammering home a mocking touchdown, smashing the Wood Elves’ drive.


It was Stormwind, the strongest of them, the one called the Golden Tornado, who raised the Hackers from their deep grief-slumber. Two words, a whisper, carried to all with the timbre of song: ‘For Clooney...’

‘FOR CLOONEY!’ leapt up their reply, the light of the sun as reflected on a spring stream, burning deep in their eyes. A defiant equalizer burned too upon the scoreboard just moments later.

But the cunning and resourceful Villains fought back and fought hard. The Hackers strove to hold their tide at bay, but another touchdown for the Dark Elves was inevitable. The Wood Elves however would not be beaten. Not today. Not Clooney’s day! They pressed hard and once more won the equalizer.

‘Thoroughly Dubious’ Duran was brought low as an Ashen Villain attempted with some success to ram one of Duran’s pom-poms down his throat. It is thought that he will have to miss the next game while the Hacker’s newly-appointed tree surgeon attempts to remove it.

As the referee raised his whistle to his mouth for the final time, a chance came for the Hackers. Caught off-guard, the Villains had lost the ball and the Hackers were quick to take advantage. The ball was plucked from the feet of the Dark Elves, thrown down the pitch. Stormwind waited, so close to the end-zone that victory was inevitable, and she raised her hands to grasp the ball and score the winning touchdown...

And then she saw it, glimmering yellow on the side of the pitch... a single buttercup, sprouting from the hateful earth. A buttercup. Clooney’s favourite. Tears welled as the Wardancer remembered her friend, Clooney the Bear.

Then the ball hit her full in the face and everything was black.